On Father’s Day, I read this article (below), and how this father of 4 wished he had his kids earlier. He had the first one at 29. After years of trying. This is different from my perspective. Where I reflected that being a father late in life has its advantages.
I won’t say if his advice is right or wrong. He does realise the sacrifices needed, and then, like a good father, he dismisses these “sacrifices” as inconsequential compared to the joy of parenthood. Maybe, if I were a father at a younger age I would also come to that realisation and make those sacrifices without any qualms.
At some point, I realised that while I became a father at fifty, and this is not the usual age one becomes a father for the first time, that I was quite aware of the advantages (and disadvantages) of being a father (first) at fifty.
Or getting married late in life.
I see younger couples struggling to juggle the demands of their marriage, and perhaps parenthood, together with their other pursuits, and their need to commit to their careers, and I do sympathise.
Z was watching a YouTube video of some kids singing “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star” to their new-born brother.
After the video ended, Z asked, “again!”
So I replayed the video. And at the end, she again asked for an encore.
And on the third run, she sang along.
For a while.
So during the sermon or homily at this Sunday’s Mass, the priest told the story of a “Peanuts” comic strip. He was concerned that “Peanuts” might not be known as the creator and writer for the strip had died 17 years ago, and the comic has no new stories since then, only re-runs.
The strip he recounted had Lucy (?) in her psychiatrist booth, and Charlie Brown. And Lucy tells Charlie Brown, that on cruise ships, some people would set up their deck chairs facing the rear (stern) of the ship and they could see where they had been. Others would set up facing the front (bow) of the ship and see where they were going. So, Lucy asked, which way is your deck chair facing, Charlie Brown?
From this article: “Love, marriage, kids — life doesn’t follow a set timeline.”
When you’re young, most of your life proceeds in a linear way. You graduate from high school, then college, then get a job. When real life doesn’t progress as smoothly, in relationships or career, it can be hard to sit with. “We think about planning our lives like there’s one of two ways to go: You’re a completely lazy slacker who lets it be all about fate. Or you’re this hyper-control freak who’s trying to force her life to go a certain way,” says Sara Eckel, author of “It’s Not You: 27 (Wrong) Reasons You’re Single.
We were putting Z to bed, and PL was reading to her the Ugly Duckling. And at around the part where the other ducklings were calling him ugly, and not wanting to be his friend, Z asked, “why the duckling have tears?’
“Because he is sad.”
“Why he sad?”
“Because the other ducklings don’t want to be his friend.”
“Why they don’t want to be his friend?”
Z is at the stage where she asks a lot of “why” questions.
… said Z.
“What ‘bear-bear’? Lazy Bear?”
She has a lot of bears. There’s ‘Care Bear’, the pirated (IP-infringed) Care Bear look-alike that is probably not licensed, because we could not find an official Care Bear with that colour and icon, which is more of a bolster because other that the head, there are not limbs of any sort. It’s her “security blanket” bear – it travels with us when we go on holiday.
Then there is ‘Heart Bear’, ‘Small Care Bear’, ‘Big Bear’, and ‘SOTA Bear’ (from School Of The Arts)… and probably a few I don’t recall offhand.
“Ya,” said Z.
“But we only just got Lazy Bear. ” A few hours before. “How can you miss ‘bear-bear’?”